Family first. There is no excuse to this simple law of nature, although we all try – don’t we? We find the little loopholes in life that make it okay to stick your family in the back seat of life while tending to “more important things” such as work. Life in our house has been a non-stop ride in the fast lane and I know my little fella feels the stress of it in his little life. Is this fair? No, it’s not! Life is so damn demanding and work calls for long tiresome hours that never seem to end. I know my work is important, but sometimes work needs to surrender to the demand of my three-year-old son.

The other morning I woke up and started my normal morning routine getting ready for work. I was in the last stages of the routine when Sammy woke up screaming – not a blood-chilling scream, but one that said he was not ready to wake up. Sometimes he’ll wake up and cry a little and then drift back to sleep – never more than a few minutes. That morning it wasn’t stopping and he started to call out for me. I can’t ignore this call. I tired to calm him down, got him some milk and food – nothing was calming him down. I sat with him for a few minutes and he was hanging on to me with everything he had… That’s when I knew I had to make the call – my little boy needed me and that is more important than my job. I called the people I needed to call, then fixed Sammy and I a bowel of yogurt and granola. As soon as I walked into the living room carrying the breakfast, Sammy lit up and a smile covered his tear-ridden face.

Family should always come first and life second, but we forget this and we tend to switch it around. Some pick friends and fun over family, but most pick work and money. I love money – I won’t deny it. Although, if you knew how much I made per year you’d know I don’t do it for the money. I realize that we must support our family and that’s why we all work, but sometimes we need to stop. Call in sick and take an unplanned day off to be there for our family who needs us. I look at Sam and I think it’s unfair to him for me to pick work over him. I do it so often, I stay after everyday for different reasons (sports or tutoring) and I leave Sam at school or have Scott pick him up. By the time I get home I spend a few quick hours with him, go to sleep and leave before he’s awake. It shouldn’t be this way – he comes first and I need to remind myself of that. The morning he needed me I surrendered to his needs over the needs of my student. Sammy is my number one and no matter who you are you’re second to him.

I feel like I was losing site of what’s important in my life to go and be there for my student. I love being that important that no one else can do my job. Although, it is a curse as well as a blessing, and putting my family second to work wasn’t working out for me. I saw the pain it was causing them and when Sammy is holding on with all he’s got – that’s a slap in my face, “I NEED YOU!” If I can’t see that, then I shouldn’t be a mother. If I can walk away from that, then I shouldn’t be a mother. This is a one-time shot to be a good parent, and if I screw it up for personal gain I cannot go back and fix it. Don’t let life suck you in – you have the control over who you are and what you need to do in life. You have the right to hit the pause button and take a moment to make sure the people who matter most to you know it.

When I saw the smile on Sammy’s face as I walked into the living room with the bowl of yogurt and granola – it was the best feeling in the wold. All he needed was his mommy and I sat down and enjoyed giving him just what he needed. You have the power – use it.

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